How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
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