Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
