I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize