yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
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