Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
