After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize