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I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
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