Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize