this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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