I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize