got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Randomize
