i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize