So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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