if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
