i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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