Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
it glows. i had to have it.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
