How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
