You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
