ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Randomize
