easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
