my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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