I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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