I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
We were destined to go to rehab together
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize