omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize
