I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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