Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
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