I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Randomize
