yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
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