just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Randomize