I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
We have so much sex to catch up on
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Randomize
