he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
