party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
