hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
i believe in u and ur pee
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
