im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
