Grow some girl-balls and come out already
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Randomize
