I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
