I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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