I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
