Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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