you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize