we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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