I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Swine flu is the new snow day.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
