She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
