i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
drinking out of a sandbucket again
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
