Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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