I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
