but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
