You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
smell my finger.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Randomize
