Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
