Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
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