If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
